The peculiar, dangerous and complex world of betting. We know that Twitch has decided to put a stop to this type of content on the streaming platform, but we cannot deny that it exists. The gamble it all on roulette It is the daily bread of many people and even in GTA Online we can run out of money.
I have matured a plan since my journey through Los Santos started again on PS5. I have managed to accumulate a good amount of chips to launch myself for a simple but ambitious goal: to leave through the front door with a million dollars in the bank account.
We are talking about Diamond Casino & Resort, a place where if you don’t comply with certain rules of etiquette they begin to look down on you. You have to pretend, as always in this life, so it’s time to go shopping at the most select places in the city.
I go to the Ponsonbys closest to my apartment and I don’t need any stylist to advise me. It’s enough for me to know that the dinner tuxedo is the best option for this occasion, just like James Bond drinking a shaken vodka martini, not mixed. I’m exhausted trying it out, but before I go there I decide to take a shower for the first time since walking around GTA Online.
Once a year it doesn’t hurt and I don’t put half a bottle of cologne on top because it doesn’t let me play. Shining shoes, tight jacket, trimmed beard And I’m more dazzling than the idiot going the wrong way with his high beams on the freeway.
From my select range of luxury cars, all earned by the sweat of my brow pulling the wheel, I choose the Entity XF. I think it fits with the style of vehicles that shine in these situations, absurdly low sports cars and that only a soccer player with money as punishment would buy.
Always complying with traffic regulations, I end up arriving at The Diamond Casino & Resort, the cradle of nonsense In this city. $50 well spent on having the valet drop me off at a premium spot in the garage. I wish I could leave a tip in his shirt pocket while I give him the stale “buy your wife something nice” comment.
to play has been said
177,200 chips accumulated since April. That is the total amount that I carry in my pocket and that I have achieved over the months. I have only entered the casino to spin the wheel and take advantage of my 1,000 daily free chips, which have the same dollar value. I have not touched any machines at all, reserving my luck for this moment.
First of all, I take a look at the slots. I would say that there are even too many and with absurd themes: Evacuator, Republican Space Rangers, Impotent Fury… Flashy names, lots of colors and little desire to spend the night here. I decide on Angel and the gentleman, who has a return rate of 98.7% and has Vice City references.
That is, we are talking about a fairly high generosity on the part of the casino management. The closer the figure is to 100%, the more chances the player has of winning. Will it be my main goose that lays the golden eggs? The truth is that no. Yes, you have to get the figures to be placed on the center line and the prizes depend on it, but it is absurdly random.
I pay for odds and there is no involvement on my part other than pulling the lever. A fools that I come out with 1,000 chips more and that it does not surprise me that it populates all the areas of the casino. It’s easy money for the bank in the long run.
It’s time for table games and I have to admit that I have a special predilection for blackjack. It’s the worst luck game you can run in, as everything is malevolently designed to suck your quarters like leeches. But beware, here you have to go with a clear mindset.
And it is that the 177,300 chips I have on me are not real, it has simply been money that the casino has given me progressively to bet. I’ve never taken it out of the building so for all practical purposes it doesn’t exist for me. It is a way of encouraging me to bet and not think about the result.
Seen what has been seen, reaching a million dollars is going to be almost impossible betting in these formats. I can’t go to the high stakes tables because I’m not a VIP, which is to say, I’m not one of those rich guys from the rooftop. I have to make do with the ordinary tables, those of the populace.
Once again, I am immersed in a loop without grace, without flavor and that I cannot understand. I raise the bet, I win, I bet again, I lose and I double the bet to recover again. Absolutely no encouragement to continue sitting at the table, a pacifier without grace. It’s not made for you to lose or win, it’s a minigame without any spirit.
The same applies to roulette and poker to 3, games in which I bet against the bank and there is no interaction with other players. And it’s not that I want GTA Online become a place to go to gamble and gorge yourself on cash, but you could take note of Red Dead Online.
There you can bet with other players, form poker tables and have a good time both with friends as with strangers. In the casino we can aspire to horse racing, which has a multiplayer mode, but still has that random factor, that nothing depends on our ability.
Closing out the night for everything low
I’ve spent too much money and I don’t care about everything. I decide to go to the bar to be served two or two hundred drinks, but I almost have a fit seeing the prices. A diamond Bleuter’d champagne is $150,000, so I just hope it’s got Swarovski all the way up there. I order a $55 The Mount whiskey, then top it off with a $350 Macbeth.
I put on a little show affect my melopea with delayed effect, ending in my collapse in front of everyone. It must have been a trip that period when I don’t remember anything, because I wake up sitting on the bathroom with my mouth in shreds.
I decide to spend my last bits of luck on roulette, but it goes wrong. I walk away with a ridiculous 7,500 RP, don’t think about it and withdraw the 87,000 chips I have left. Yet another day where it’s clear to me that gambling sucks.